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| Jeep covered in Mud after driving through the Meadows |
My hand shook, dirt fell on my face I turned my head and spit out little chunks of rust. The grinder I held in my hand skidded, it cut across my wrist and it immediately started bleeding. I shut it off, stood up and brushed a pile of rust off of my self that I had ground off the frame. Blood dripping down my arm I wondered how I had gotten myself to where I was.
Last year, my dad and I found my
Last year, my dad and I found my
first vehicle. We noticed a white Jeep Wrangler in someone’s backyard. It had no top, no doors, a rusty frame and body, and the transmission was sitting in the back seat. I looked at my dad and asked if we could make it back to what it used to be, he turned to me and said,
"Its going to take a lot of effort, but if your willing to put in the hours then you can do whatever you set your mind to."
I was determined to make it come to life. I bought it for three hundred dollars and brought it to my grandparents shop to rebuild it. My goal was to strip it down, repair it and make it look great by the time I got my liscence.
That summer I worked three days a week at a landscaping company, and all my earnings went towards fixing my Jeep. When I wasn’t landscaping, I was grinding steel and tightening bolts. My dad would guide me on how to do things and gave me objectives. I worked diligently, and he helped me when he could.
Halfway through summer, the frame was finished, and the wheels were on. I felt like I had done so much but accomplished so little in the grand scheme of things. I kept working, spending most weekends buried in an engine rather than being with friends. After reshaping the new brake lines, cleaning the motor and transmission, and testing it, things were looking great.
Next I fixed the body and put it back on the frame. My dad showed me how to cut steel and weld. It seemed like everyday I was sending out more money for parts, but it was finally starting to look like a Jeep again. Hard work and determination was really starting to pay off.
With everything back together, I was very excited as everyday seemed to be so close to the finish. I found a hard top and doors at a very good price. I had invested twenty three hundred dollars into my beautiful Jeep. My dedication had brought me so much satisfaction. I drive my Jeep everyday and have worked on it many times to fix little problems. I am a proud owner knowing that I accomplished tasks very few kids my age could ever do. My strong dedication to finishing my Jeep was driven by the glory of self accomplishment, and the experience has brought me and my dad closer than ever.
"Its going to take a lot of effort, but if your willing to put in the hours then you can do whatever you set your mind to."
I was determined to make it come to life. I bought it for three hundred dollars and brought it to my grandparents shop to rebuild it. My goal was to strip it down, repair it and make it look great by the time I got my liscence.
That summer I worked three days a week at a landscaping company, and all my earnings went towards fixing my Jeep. When I wasn’t landscaping, I was grinding steel and tightening bolts. My dad would guide me on how to do things and gave me objectives. I worked diligently, and he helped me when he could.
Halfway through summer, the frame was finished, and the wheels were on. I felt like I had done so much but accomplished so little in the grand scheme of things. I kept working, spending most weekends buried in an engine rather than being with friends. After reshaping the new brake lines, cleaning the motor and transmission, and testing it, things were looking great.
Next I fixed the body and put it back on the frame. My dad showed me how to cut steel and weld. It seemed like everyday I was sending out more money for parts, but it was finally starting to look like a Jeep again. Hard work and determination was really starting to pay off.
With everything back together, I was very excited as everyday seemed to be so close to the finish. I found a hard top and doors at a very good price. I had invested twenty three hundred dollars into my beautiful Jeep. My dedication had brought me so much satisfaction. I drive my Jeep everyday and have worked on it many times to fix little problems. I am a proud owner knowing that I accomplished tasks very few kids my age could ever do. My strong dedication to finishing my Jeep was driven by the glory of self accomplishment, and the experience has brought me and my dad closer than ever.
I see someone who put a lot of time, money, and effort into a project, and is now reaping the rewards of that hard work.
ReplyDeleteYou say it might be too long. Perhaps, rather than telling the story chronologically, you could start with an image of your restored Jeep, then flash back to the some of the chief improvements you made.
I was wondering if you dad was a mechanic. How much work did dad & grandpa do? What was it like working with them?
This is a great topic. With a little polish, your essay can be very strong.
1.) I see a strong narrative which shows not only how the Jeep changed, but also how the author changed as well. As the Jeep came together out of scrap, the author became more confident and satisfied in his work and in himself.
ReplyDelete2.) I would condense and organize the essay to make it more coherent. Try organizing an introduction, then the process and journey of repairing the Jeep, and finally how you changed and how you feel now. Some of the Jeep repairs are a bit repetitive--try and cut some of the least important steps of fixing up the Jeep out.
3.) The essay is longer than it needs to be because of the over-description and repetition in repairing the Jeep. Try and shorten the description and cut out some of the lesser details in repairing the Jeep. Also, mention the father at the end of the paper and maybe how he changed as well.
4.)Overall, I was kept interested in the story in that there was so much detail and effort put into repairing the Jeep. The relationship between the Dad, the son, and the Jeep, really created meaning in the story.